Leaving takes a toll. I am unnerved by a photo of me. The five years ago woman and the woman in the mirror look like distant relatives as if the reflection in the mirror was 15 years older than the woman in the photo. They are both me but it feels as though I am in a history museum peering at old photos of people unrelated to me, photos from generations ago. Time is a willful bitch. She knows how to dig her claws in and leave the scars to prove she was there. The scars are etched on my face in the forms of deep lines. Too much sun, too much coffee, too much junk food, staying in a bad relationship too long: it is poison in ones later decades. I left New England and now after being settled for more than a year rebuilding must begin: body and soul. Nothing can or will replace lost time but grabbing the moment must happen. A new regimen has begun to take shape. Daily there is yoga even if muscles are resistant at first … it all feels better later. The week must also be shared with Cardio several times and strength training four times. Finding one’s body when it has been lost to disuse is never easy. The task becomes even difficult with the passage of time. An ill used body effects the whole so the mind wants – needs - exercise as well.
The fast was been an interesting journey to myself. I am certain that I have not experience real hunger since the second day. Fluid intake has increased dramatically. I’ve slept better this past week than in months. My eye sight has improved – who the heck knows what that is all about.
Time to finish the half dozen short stories sitting on my computer and catch with my photography to do list! Spanish lessons are creeping along but creeping is better than standing still! Energy is a wonderful thing! I am so grateful for my life!
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